If the late afternoon brings more than just shadows in your house, if it brings restlessness, confusion, pacing, or frustration, your person with dementia may be experiencing something called sundowning. You’re not imagining it. You’re not doing anything wrong. This is real. And itās one of the most challenging parts of dementia care. Letās talk about what it is, why it happens, and what you can actually do to survive it, with your sanity (mostly) intact.
š What is Sundowning?
Sundowning refers to a pattern of increased confusion, agitation, or anxiety that often starts in the late afternoon and lasts into the evening. Your person might:
- Pace or wander
- Repeat questions
- Become paranoid or accuse you of things
- Try to āgo homeā even if theyāre already there
- Get angry or withdrawn
- Itās often unpredictable, and it can feel like their personality flips around 3 or 4 p.m., just when youāre exhausted yourself.
š Why Does It Happen?
Thereās no single answer, but hereās what we know:
- Changes in light can confuse the brain (the shift from day to night is disorienting)
- Sleep disruption or fatigue builds throughout the day
- Overstimulation or unmet needs (like hunger, pain, needing to toilet) can peak late in the day
- Internal body clock changes (circadian rhythm dysregulation) can mess with their natural rhythm
š” What Can You Do?
Sundowning wonāt always go away, but the good news is, you can reduce it with the right strategies. Here are a few that make a real difference:
- š Set a calming afternoon routine: Donāt wait for the meltdown. Get ahead of it. A walk, a snack, a soft music playlist, dim lights. Think of it like ātucking inā the day before the chaos hits.
- š Avoid ātriggersā when possible: Too much noise, screen time, clutter, or complicated conversation can add fuel to the fire. Keep it calm and familiar. For bathing specifically, see my 10 must-know showering tips.
- š£ļø Donāt correct or argue: If theyāre saying they āneed to go to workā or āwant to go home,ā try redirecting instead of explaining. (I cover exactly how in my guide to dementia redirection.)
- š§ Give them a purpose: Folding towels, sorting silverware, or holding a baby doll or comfort item can help refocus their energy.
- š Prep your evening space early: Close blinds before sunset. Turn on lamps. Create a sense of āsettling inā before the light outside starts to fade.
š„ Want my full list of tips, scripts, and sensory tools?
I created a download called āSurviving Sundowning,ā and itās packed with:
- Easy-to-implement strategies
- My favorite redirection phrases
- Evening activity ideas
- A printable checklist for daily routine prep
- Tools that actually help calm the chaos
Grab your copy of Surviving Sundowning.
ā Sundowning FAQ
What causes sundowning in dementia patients?
Sundowning is likely caused by a combination of circadian rhythm changes, fatigue built up throughout the day, shifts in light as day turns to evening, unmet needs like hunger or pain, and overstimulation. Itās not one single trigger, itās a perfect storm that tends to peak in the late afternoon.
At what stage of dementia does sundowning start?
Sundowning most often shows up in the middle stages of dementia, but it can appear earlier or later. Not every person with dementia experiences sundowning, and the intensity can vary day to day.
How long does sundowning usually last each day?
For most people, sundowning lasts from late afternoon (around 3 to 4 p.m.) into the early evening, and can continue until bedtime. Some caregivers notice it fades once their person falls asleep, while others find it disrupts sleep as well.
What should you not do when someone is sundowning?
Avoid arguing, correcting, or trying to reason with them. Donāt introduce new or overstimulating environments, loud noise, or complex questions. Instead, stay calm, keep lighting soft but adequate, and use gentle redirection.
Can medication help with sundowning?
Sometimes, but medication is usually a last resort. Most dementia experts recommend trying environmental and routine-based strategies first, because medications can have side effects and may increase fall risk. Always talk to your personās doctor before changing any medications.
š Final Thoughts
Sundowning can feel like walking into a storm every night. But you donāt have to weather it alone, and you donāt have to keep guessing. With the right tools and a little preparation, you can bring more peace to your evenings, and to your personās brain and body. And on the hard days? Know this: You are doing an incredible job with an impossible task. If youāre early in the journey, you might also find comfort in what I wish every new caregiver knew. Even when itās 6 pm and the house is upside down. Youāve got this.
I’m so glad to have randomly see your Instagram posts. You have given many tips on how to handle my husband with some form of dementia.
So happy to have helped!